Get angry
The other night, my son got angry. I did not let him play his video games so he had to throw his tantrums. At first, he was just crying, bawling. And then he started throwing things. Some of his toys found their way to my face and body. He kept shouting “I want to play” while crying.
I kept silent.
Then after a few minutes, I called him.
He came to me and sat on my lap.
I told him the reason why he was not allowed to play.
I asked him to say, “I’m crying because..”
He replied, “I’m crying because I did not listen to you.”
Then added, “But I want to plaaayy, huhuhu”.
I told him that it’s okay.
I told him that he could get mad.
“You can feel angry but you can’t hit or hurt others. You can cry or shout in a pillow but don’t do something that would hurt someone.”
I let him know that acknowledging his mistakes was a good thing. And that I was proud of him. He stopped crying and gave me a hug afterwards.
The complexities of emotions are a struggle to deal with. Even for us, adults. What more for the children.
Our emotions, whatever they may be, are valid. Each of us has our own way to express. We could not and should not dictate how others should feel.
Let’s remind ourselves that sometimes, empathy is enough.